Men vs Women

Have you ever Googled – “How to avoid a break up?” or have you searched for a book with the title “How to have a healthy relationship”? (PS: Foreign Author, No credibility for Charulatha publications in this Topic: D) If you haven’t, the day isn’t far. Someday you will definitely want to know the reason why things are not working as expected between you two. Even if you read all such books and thesis written by some old bearded jerk professor from some American university, things won’t work as expected. Men and Women can never be compatible. Then you may ask, why in this world they fall in love. No one will acquiesce to the bitter truth until they experience it. It is characteristic of one gender to bemoan the other. I am not going to denounce Women for the break ups. I am just going to write how Men and Women think differently. But this post may be inclined towards Men. (PS: I am not a Male Chauvinist, Mother Promise!)

Men and Women don’t get along too well because their views are always contradictory. Women start thinking about marriage the moment guys propose to them. But Men often forget that a relationship should ultimately end up in a marriage. Marriage is always a burden to Men.She calls up her boy friend in the night, she sends a text message asking him to call, starts with the routine topics –What you doing? What did you eat? Women’s mind is like a monkey. It just can’t sit in one place. All of a sudden she wants to talk about their marriage. Not just that. She would think of a name for her kids, which school to put them in. (What will you do if your guy is impotent??) What do you think your boyfriend will be doing at the other end while you are talking such topics – he will be playing Angry Birds.(One sec..Am I saying the other way? I sense so but lemme continue with the flow) Women are too futuristic. They would plan their wardrobe for the week next today. Every girl knows what she is going to wear to office the next day (Salwar,duppata if she wears one,footwear,earings,Maskara color,other accessories) unlike Men, who will get up from the bed, take bath, see if he has any shirt in the wardrobe. If all his shirts are to be washed, he calls up his manager and informs that he is sick and gets back to sleep. How do you expect Men to think that far in life??

Men usually update their relationship status with the Girl’s name tagged. All his Guy friends will definitely click on that hyperlink and check the Girl’s profile. He likes to hear this comment from his friends –“Dai unaka ipidi oru figure ah???” That is the only moment where you can see a Guy blushing. But Women usually don’t update their relationship status, may be because FaceBook allows only one Guy’s name to be tagged. Women are always cautious, worried about the future. They usually don’t like their future boyfriend to know about the past relationships. That is the reason why they keep their relationship under cover.

You can easily fit Men into a single framework; there are only two types of Men under the sun – One who drinks and one who doesn’t. But if you try assorting Women, I am not sure if we would be able to finish it even after several light-years. Each day we keep encountering a devious and baffling female. All Men think alike. They have lot of things in common unlike Women. Mathematically speaking A n B is an infinite set for Men and a Null set for Women. Sex, Booze and TV are things which unite men. Men and Women are sexually incompatible and that is why Men still continue to pay for sex. Many factors influence a Woman’s desire for sex and almost nothing impacts a Man’s. A woman will spend several hours getting ready for a date, she would have meticulous adherence to her looks, dress, hair, nails and accessories. She will spend the evening with him waiting for him to compliment her dress, hair or nail and will be hurt when he doesn’t. But the Guy will notice nothing except the dress and that too with a sense of irritation as he figures out how difficult it will be to take off. He will spend the evening wondering how much the evening is costing him and how long before he can go home and have sex. Guys think about sex even when they are stranded in a lonely island.

A guy abuses another guy then they both are friends, if he abuses another guy’s mom then they both are best friends. A Guy can either be a friend or a best friend to another guy unlike Women who can be acquaintances, just friends, friends, good friends, close friends or best friends. Whatever a Girl says is always antagonistic. If she says to her friend – “you are looking cute in this picture” it means her friend is looking awful. If she says “Go ahead”, she is not giving you her assent instead she is daring you. Thanks and Thanks a Lot don’t mean the same. She is sarcastic if she says Thanks a Lot. “That’s Ok” is the most formidable word she can use to a Man to threaten him that he will pay for his mistakes later. “Whatever!” is a Woman’s way of telling Fu*k you!!

Relationships are all about compromise. But Men and Women actually want different things. Women seek attention, they want to Shop all the time, eat out at restraunts and Party. But Men want Beer, Sex and to be left alone on the couch to watch TV. Since their interests are not in accord, neither can spend any time with the other while doing what they want to be doing so why Bother???